tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-65347584423805210682024-03-12T17:38:03.489-07:00You Might As Well Make LemonadeLearning to love life as a single mom... all the crazy twists and turns and hysterical things that happen as I learn.Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.comBlogger143125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-30703871935153651812022-08-09T20:48:00.001-07:002022-08-09T20:48:27.914-07:00Betrayal<p>Wow. Where and how do I even begin? </p><p><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">Recently, I found out, to my utter horror, that I’ve been betrayed by my third closest friend in the world. Betrayed. Defamed. Lied about… blatantly. To say the least, I am devastated. Completely and utterly devastated. And I simply don’t know how to move forward. </span></p><p><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">I have a guy friend. We are very close. We have spent the better part of nine months together. We’ve laughed, cried, shared, grown, forgave, healed, etc. together. I’ve helped him and he has helped me. We have a wonderful, mutual respect for each other. I’ve posted many of our adventures together on Facebook, well, because I wanted to share my joy with others. I never tagged him in them, or showed his face, due to unfair judgement and gossip it could bring us. As careful as I was, I never imagined what a terrible error in judgement that would come to be. This close friend, who 100% knows that me and my guy are just friends, took my Facebook posts, plus our conversations about my guy, and spread it around, near and far, that I was going around telling people that he and I were involved in a serious, romantic relationship. I’m not sure what all was said exactly, but there was apparently more. The thing is… we’re not. And I have never, nor would I ever, say that when it’s not true. For one, I’m not a liar. For two, I know the repercussions that could come from it. And boy, repercussions sure did come. </span><br></p><p><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">The worst part of being lied on, is just that. The lying. This friend literally made up that I was going around telling everyone that. Like, pulled it out of her butt and completely fabricated it. And in doing so, she has essentially ruined my life. My guy friend and I can no longer hang out due to some of the more serious repercussions. I can’t see his daughter anymore. He’s having to field phone call after phone call regarding all of this, at one of the worst times in his life. This so called friend never even considered how awful the ripples of these lies would be. Surely, if she’d thought of it, she wouldn’t have spread the lies, right? Unless she just hates me that much deep down. </span><br></p><p><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">You know, previously, I would have literally bet my life on the fact that she’d never do that to me. We’ve been friends for years. Years! It hurts to find out that I’ve been scammed all these years… that she’s not the friend I thought she was. How does someone do something like that?? </span><br></p><p><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">The three people I’ve discussed it with say that she must have been so jealous of my happy life, that it must have made her feel good and important to have something interesting to say, true or not. Well, she has stolen my happy life from me. She has put chains on where I can go and what I can do, even who I can be with. She’s even stolen my Facebook posting from me. I can’t trust that she won’t take anything I post and use it against me. I had to even miss National Cat Day yesterday!! 😭😭 </span><br></p><p><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">Since I can never share this on my Facebook page. I’m sharing the “post that can never be posted” here. I just need somewhere to let it out. </span><br></p><p>————————————————————</p><p>“For those that know me well, you know that I live within a tiny circle. I don’t let too many people get close to me in order to preserve my world. For the past 13 years, I have put myself out there on Facebook. I have shared happiness, humor, heartache, joy, frustration, failures, and successes. That has been my way of sharing a little bit of myself with other people. It has truly been a joy to me to interact with others in this way.</p><p><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">That being said… one of the things I hate, and I know that God hates it as well, is gossip. I also hate lies. That puts gossipers and liars in the same category. I’ve recently been the victim of betrayal. My heart is devastated by it. The worst thing is, you never think you’re going to be betrayed by those that say they love and care about you. </span><br></p><p><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">I’ve always heard the statement, “If someone says bad things to you about me, what does it say about you that they felt comfortable doing that?“ I will also say that gossip is cowardly. And lies are even worse. If you want to know something about me, just have the guts to ask me to my face. I will be 100% honest with you because I may be many things in this life, but a liar is not one of them. </span><br></p><p><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">All that being said, apparently there are some “friends of mine“ (and I use that term very loosely today) that have set out to destroy my little world by using the glimpses of my life I’ve shared, all while sitting upon a throne of lies. I hope you guys are happy. You know who you are. And I’m here to remind you that God knows too. You are lucky that he is a forgiving God, because I’ll be hard pressed to forgive and I will never forget.”</span><br></p><p>————————————————————</p><p>May God have mercy on their souls. Like I said, He is a forgiving God. They are luckier than I am. Their sins will be forgiven, and no one will be the wiser. Me? I have essentially lost everything, and I have to live with the repercussions of their lies forever. That’s a long, long time. Sigh. </p><p><br></p><p><br></p><p><br></p>Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-9226848812220520132021-09-25T16:40:00.001-07:002021-09-25T16:42:51.122-07:00REAL TALK # 1 - Transparency<div>REAL TALK # 1:</div><div>I’ve been thinking a lot about being ‘real’ and ‘transparent’ lately. Especially in pictures. Honestly, I hate filters on pictures. I think it sends a terrible message to others, basically saying that your real self isn’t good enough and you must filter it to fit in, or be acceptable. Sometimes people filter their pictures so much that I literally cannot recognize them when I see them out in public. How sad is that?? What message are we sending our friends, our kids, our grandkids? </div><div><br></div><div>Y’all. We all have wrinkles. Or pimples. Or dark circles under our eyes. Or red blotches. We all look old, fat, frumpy, or just blah sometimes. We all have bad hair days, or days we are bloated and look gross. And you know what? That’s okay! That’s just our real selves. God made us that way! </div><div><br></div><div>I’m a selfie taker. I admit it. And most of the time, they are terrible. But I’m okay with that. </div><div>I am the one that likes to take pictures… of scenery, family, animals, friends, events, trips, etc. But not everyone likes to take pictures, or always have their phone in their hand. I often take a selfie to show that I was there, in the moment too. </div><div><br></div><div>Y’all, we’re only here for a limited time, all of us. Take the pictures, take the selfies, but please stop feeling like you must filter every photo of yourself. Let’s be real. Let’s be present and in the moment. And remember, it’s okay to not be perfect. ❤️</div><img width="100%" src="https://drive.google.com/uc?id=14QWSvGwXtDRco9XMj7_4Bwz2ROKv_ryb">Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-1703343966594058982021-07-21T19:55:00.001-07:002021-07-21T19:55:28.518-07:00Birthday Musings<p>Yesterday was my 51st birthday… fifty-one years… wow. I remember as a teenager how 51 seemed OLD. Now, as I look ahead, I realize that if I live as long as my mom did, I only have 29 years left. I understand that 29 years is a long time, but I also know that it will pass in the literal blink of an eye. On the other hand, 29 more years is a long time to live this life alone… Man, I really want to find my soulmate and live my life to the fullest with them. How does one even go about finding their soulmate in this life? I thought I’d found it one time. I was for sure wrong though. 🤔 </p><p>I sure missed my Momma yesterday. I mean, I always miss both my mom and my dad, but my mom just had a way with birthdays. It didn’t matter if you were turning 1, 21, or 51, she’d be there to make a big deal out of it. Although I received many, many wishes yesterday, and I truly cherished each of them, it wasn’t, and will never be the same, without my Momma to make me feel special, to take me to lunch, to buy me too many gifts. I didn’t even take yesterday off work because I’d have just been alone… </p><p>I’ve really been feeling a ‘loss’ lately. I think it’s just the realization that I’ve been alone for 12 years now. That’s a REALLY long time to do this life alone! That’s too long to be the only adult, the decision maker. A long time without true love and affection. Sigh. Although God has given me so many blessings in this life, I sincerely hope my time alone is almost over, and that He gives me a companion soon. ❤️ </p><p>My mom’s favorite bible verse was Isaiah 40:31. <span class="versenum" style="font-size: 1.2rem; line-height: normal; position: relative; vertical-align: text-top; top: auto; font-family: system-ui, -apple-system, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Ubuntu, Cantarell, "Noto Sans", sans-serif, Arial; font-weight: 700; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"> “</span><span style="font-size: 16px; font-family: system-ui, -apple-system, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Ubuntu, Cantarell, "Noto Sans", sans-serif, Arial; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">But they that wait upon the </span><span class="small-caps" style="font-size: 16px; font-family: system-ui, -apple-system, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Ubuntu, Cantarell, "Noto Sans", sans-serif, Arial; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">Lord</span><span style="font-size: 16px; font-family: system-ui, -apple-system, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Ubuntu, Cantarell, "Noto Sans", sans-serif, Arial; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"> shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.”</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 16px; font-family: system-ui, -apple-system, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Ubuntu, Cantarell, "Noto Sans", sans-serif, Arial; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">The older I get, the more I appreciate this scripture. #waitingontheLordtoprovide</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 16px; font-family: system-ui, -apple-system, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Ubuntu, Cantarell, "Noto Sans", sans-serif, Arial; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"><br></span></p>Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-29185339101684657302021-07-17T21:00:00.001-07:002021-07-17T21:00:58.432-07:00Dream - The Way Home <p>One night I went to bed, troubled about something. God gave me a dream that, even though I couldn’t interpret it at the time, would eventually become so clear…</p><p>I dreamed that I was driving slowly down a long driveway towards a white double wide mobile home. In the front yard, there were lots of young kids and young adults playing volleyball. There was only one adult out there with them. It was a friend of mine that is very friendly to the young people in real life. As I got closer to them, I realized that all of the young men were naked from the waist down. All of them. And this friend of mine ran up to me and said, “come play volleyball with us!” I looked at these naked boys and said, “no, that’s not for me, thanks” and kept driving towards the house. I was so shocked that no one seemed to care that these young men were naked! I parked my car around the side of the house and went in the back door. I walked into the living room and it was full of my friends and brethren from my home assembly. I sat down in the living room but no one spoke to me. They were just awkwardly looking around at each other. I specifically recognized two people, although in my dream I knew the rest were Cushing brethren in general. One of the older men looked at me and said, “I think you should go on. This isn’t for you anymore.” I was hurt, but got up and left. As I was driving away from the back of the house, I called my mom and told her I was trying to get home but couldn’t find the right way. She told me that if I’d get on I-95, and follow it around, that it would bring me home. I argued and told her that I always went another way. She just kept insisting that I take this new route and I’d be okay. </p><p>Then I woke up. Fast forward to today: The white double wide? My home church. The adult friend that was out in the yard with the young people? Turns out, in real life she was cheating on her husband with several of those young men. The two people I specifically recognized in the house? They are no longer together. The man that told me to leave and go on? An elder in my home assembly where I no longer feel welcome or wanted. The new route that my mom sent me on? I’m divorced and trying to find my way to heaven in the midst of chaos. </p><p>Wow. God was telling me ALL the things, I just couldn’t hear them at the time! He’s done that for me many, many times over the years. I need to be a better listener… </p>Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-89621230458274783612019-03-17T20:43:00.000-07:002019-03-17T20:43:49.032-07:00Day 14 of 365<span style="font-size: large;">This is the last day that I will be posting my weight journey on my blog. But it's not over FOR SURE! I am moving my journey posts to my Facebook group: "A Year In The Life... My Journey To Fabulous". Join me there as I navigate this journey with friends! Friends make everything better!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Today was good. I cooked and baked all day. I found a muffin recipe that is great! PTL! All I had to do is mix 1 sugar free chocolate cake mix with 1 can of Diet Coke. It made 24 muffins @ 1.5 points each. Yippee!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>FOOD: DAY 14 of 365</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Breakfast:</u></b> 2 Kodiak pancakes @ 1.5 points each (3 points), 3 T. of SF Maple Sugar Farms syrup (0 points) and 4 slices of Hormel Black Label fully cooked bacon (3 points) for a breakfast total of 6 points. YUM! So thankful my friend told me about that syrup!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Lunch:</u></b> I made a delicious Weight Watchers Chicken Mac Casserole, which is basically macaroni and cheese with chicken added. It was luscious! And only 3 points per serving. I paired it with corn (0 points) and a cottage cheese cup (3 points) for a lunch total of 6 points.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Dinner:</u></b> Homemade enchiladas (2 points), Great Value refried beans (0 points), green beans (0 points) and 24 bite sized Tostitos (4 points) for a dinner total of 6 points. It was delicious and very filling.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Snack:</u></b> I had to try one of the muffins I made to see if they were any good, so I split one with my mom. Since they are 1.5 points each, I guess a half of one would be .75 points.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">On another note, I did have a tsp of peanut butter before I went to bed and I was down another pound this morning. I seriously think there might be something to that. Time will tell.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I'll be back to post occasionally as I hit major milestones, and of course when I hit goal weight. That will deserve a big, long post. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">42 meals down, 1053 to go! </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">In the meantime...</span><br />
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<br />Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-84509624962572943892019-03-16T19:47:00.002-07:002019-03-16T19:47:54.601-07:00Day 13 of 365<span style="font-size: large;">I did it!!! I lost another pound today to make me "in the next lower tens" which is the lowest I've been in YEARS. I am super excited about that!! This is coming from someone who repeatedly said, time and time again, "I can't lose weight. No matter what I do, I just can't". Yeah, right. Talk about motivation to keep going. I do think eating a few more points each day is helping... and who knows? Maybe the peanut butter before bed helped too. Haha!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I had to run to Stillwater today so I totally planned out to have Taco Bell for lunch. I've been thinking about it and have been biding my time. Today was the day and let me tell you it was worth <i>every</i> point. DELISH! And I love knowing I can have it occasionally without "cheating". </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">An NSV (non-scale victory) that I had today: My mom asked for Long John Silvers for dinner. Oh man, do I love me some LJS! But I did not order myself anything, especially since I had TB for lunch. I drove all the way home smelling that fish (30 minutes) planning to bake some fish sticks for my dinner, but by the time I got home it didn't even smell good anymore. Woo hoo! All in all, it was a good day. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>FOOD - DAY 13 OF 365:</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Breakfast:</u></b> Old faithful, peanut butter toast (6 points).</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Lunch:</u></b> Taco Bell: THREE Doritos Locos Tacos @ 5 points each = lunch total of 15 points. Yikes. But, I had the points so I *tried* not to feel too guilty about it.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Dinner:</u></b> Scout's honor, I was not hungry for dinner. Like, at all. I don't know if it was all the fat in the tacos at lunch, the sodium, or what, but I just wasn't hungry. I knew I needed to eat something though to keep my metabolism going, so I had oatmeal. I knew it was low fat and low sodium so it was a good choice. Quaker Oats less sugar cinnamon and pecan oatmeal bowl (5 points). Yummy!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Snack:</u></b> 0 points so far, but I may throw in a tsp of peanut butter before bed, just to keep my luck going. We'll see!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Still motivated. I'm still doing this! They say if you do something for 21 days in a row, it becomes a habit and is way easier to stick with. So far, so good, but I'm aiming for that 21 day mark, just in case!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">39 meals down, 1056 to go! #onmyway #nevergiveup</span><br />
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<img alt="Amazing weight loss quotes... 5890 #weightlossquotes" src="https://i.pinimg.com/564x/c1/9a/ba/c19abaebeeef2e3e08cb10faadac4f4e.jpg?b=t" />Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-3541204551122683472019-03-15T19:20:00.001-07:002019-03-15T19:20:11.386-07:00Day 12 of 365<span style="font-size: large;">I was down 11 lbs as of this morning. If I lose .6 tonight, I will weigh less than I have in years and years. I can't wait and am keeping my fingers crossed! I just know it's going to happen!! (I won't let myself be disappointed if it doesn't though... I'll just keep on keeping on.)</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Confession:</i> I'm bored with my food choices that I made this week. Since I have to cook on the weekends for the whole week, I'm going to have to mix it up some this weekend. I need new things to try. I'm shooting for biscuits again, and some kind of muffin... maybe legal cake? Hey, a girl can dream, right? #girlonamission</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><u><b>FOOD - DAY 12 OF 365:</b></u></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><u><b>Breakfast:</b></u> Peanut butter toast again. 3 points for the bread and 3 for the peanut butter for a total of 6 points for breakfast. Speaking of bread, my dang Walmart doesn't carry my bread, my sausage, my cheese or even club soda! Ahhhh! The perils of small town living.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><u><b>Lunch:</b></u> Chicken Fried Rice and Great Northern Beans. Weird combo, I know. I added the beans (on the side) for added protein. I had 1 1/2 servings of the CFR (9 points) because I'm trying to use a few more points each day. Since my beans were 0 points, my lunch total was 9 points.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><u><b>Dinner:</b></u> Nachos. I REALLY wanted to make this pizza on Gluten-Free crust that I found, but I was out of pizza sauce, naturally. I decided to go do my grocery shopping before dinner and by the time I was finished, I certainly was not in the mood to cook anymore. Nothing at all (legal) sounded good, so nachos it was since they were easy. I used 30 bite sized Tostitos (5 points), chili beans (0 points), corn (0 points) and 1/2 cup Fat Free cheddar (1 point). Usually the cheese is 0 points but that's when I only use 1/4 cup. Dinner total was 6 points.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><u><b>Snack: </b></u> None.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">36 meals down, 1059 meals to go. I'm in it to win it, y'all! This time next year... woot! I'm going to be skinny...or at least WAY smaller than I am now.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-1872793253036766232019-03-14T20:38:00.001-07:002019-03-14T20:38:13.024-07:00Day 11 of 365<span style="font-size: large;">It's been a long day. Work job #1, go to the bank, work job #2, grab dinner, work job #3. Whew! I'm exhausted and my allergies are still kicking my rear as well. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I'm finding that I eat my meals as I should, and then by dinner, I'm not very hungry and could really just go without. I love that empty stomach feeling. But, I know that isn't a good way to do this, so I eat supper... regardless of how small the points are. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Tonight I decided to change it up. I tried for Subway again (remember, last time they were out of bread?). Well, this time they had bread. Yay! I ordered my mom's sandwich first and then I (tried) to order mine. NO TURKEY! Ugh! I mean, really. I am not a ham eater at all, so I got the only other meat that I really like there... bacon. Yum, but way too many points! Err! So frustrating. But at least eating too few points for dinner did not happen tonight. Lol. There's always a bright side.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>FOOD - DAY 11</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Breakfast:</u></b> I ate pancakes again, but in an effort to use a little more points (I had no idea what Subway would do for my points later in the day!), I had 3 pancakes (4 points), 2 T. Maple Grove Farms SF syrup (0 points) and 4 slices of Hormel Black Label bacon (3 points) for a breakfast total of 7 points.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Lunch:</u></b> I had soft chicken tacos again: 2 Mission Carb Balance tortillas (4 points), chicken (0 points), taco seasoning (0 points), chili beans (0 points), 2 T. Tostitos Queso Blanco (2 points) and Fat Free cheese (0 points) for a lunch total of 6 points. It was just as delicious as it was two days ago.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Dinner:</u></b> Subway: 1 six inch Italian bread (6 points), 3 slices of bacon (5 points), white American cheese ( 2 points), 1 T. of Kraft light mayo (1 point) and Lay's Oven Baked potato chips (nice to have something crunchy!) for 4 points. Dinner totaled 18 points! Well, that was unexpected! Yikes!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Snack:</u></b> None.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Even though dinner was so many points, I'm still under my points for the day, and that is all that really matters. It was good, but not something I'll probably do again for a little while. Spending that many points on one meal is kind of traumatizing. Lol.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">33 meals down, 1062 to go. "This girl is on fire!"</span><br />
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<img alt="Weight-Loss Inspiration From Instagram | POPSUGAR Fitness" src="https://i.pinimg.com/564x/83/1d/59/831d59f918ba4e48d7cc3c5e623ea6c9.jpg?b=t" />Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-5589064698379888702019-03-13T19:53:00.001-07:002019-03-13T19:53:28.182-07:00Day 10 of 365<span style="font-size: large;">You g</span><span style="font-size: large;">uys... the WIND. I am so over it. And my allergies... GAH! I wish everyone would go out and mow their freaking yards and kill all those little purple flowers (Henbit). UGH.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Well, I've been on this journey for 10 days now. And not once in those 10 days have I thought about quitting. I'm seriously in it to win it this time... and I can't even believe it. I don't know where this determination came from, but I'm thrilled I have it!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I have noticed something that I think it hindering me this week. Due to so many zero point foods that I eat, I'm not eating that many points each day. Weight Watchers lets me "roll" over 4 unused points per day, storing them up for a splurge at the end of the week. I haven't used any of them, and don't plan to, at least not at this point, but I'm ending the day with WAY more than 4 left over... and I'm not losing good this week. My body is screaming to me not to starve it, even though I'm full after every meal. So, that being said, I'm going to try to eat a few more points each day. I mean, I could have 10 at a time if I'd let myself have a donut, but that's not an option for me right now. My willpower is strong and it needs to stay that way! Donuts are my true weakness.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">My mission for this weekend is to cook some new foods, and maybe a couple of repeats. My taco meat was so good last week that I'm craving it again this week. Lol. I'm also on the hunt for "legal" biscuits and muffins of some sort. We shall see.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>FOOD - DAY 10:</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Breakfast:</u></b> 2 Kodiak Pancakes (made with the Kodiak waffle mix. 1/4 cup of the mix made several at 1.5 points each. I had two of them for 3 points. They have so much protein in them that two fills me up. After polling Facebook, I finally found some delicious sugar free syrup... Maple Grove Farms. It is fairly thick and doesn't have that weird "sour" taste that the other brands I've tried have had. SCORE! 2 T. was all it took and that was 0 points. I also had 4 pieces of the Hormel Black Label fully cooked bacon for 3 points. All for a breakfast total of 6 points.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Lunch:</u></b> 1 Salmon patty (3 points), 1/2 cup of WW Scalloped Potatoes (3 points), and Green Lima Beans (0 points) for a lunch total of 6 points.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Dinner:</u></b> It was late, I was tired, and didn't want to cook. I ate leftover Great Northern Beans (0 points), corn (0 points) and a snack cup of cottage cheese (3 points). See what I mean about not using many points? </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Snack: Nothin</u>g</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I'm tired of the foods I've cooked for this week. Ready for something different. I can't wait until next week. It's Spring Break and I can cook lots of different things to try out. I've also heard that eating peanut butter before bed would help you to lose weight. I did some Googling on that and turns out, it can. So, add 3 points to my Snack category. I think I'm going to try it.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">My motivation is strong... praise God. Seriously, He's the only reason I can do this. My mom had KFC again tonight and I didn't!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">30 meals down... 1065 meals to go. #onwardandupward (well, maybe #downward in this case).</span><br />
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<img alt="Clean Eating Overhaul: 30-Day Weight Loss Program - eat clean and lose weight along the way!" src="https://i.pinimg.com/564x/2f/88/a9/2f88a9cdbdce2b5f81ae076d06a1ca0a.jpg" />Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-68096753386239142019-03-12T19:09:00.001-07:002019-03-12T19:11:01.914-07:00Day 9 of 365<span style="font-size: large;">So far, so good! I can't believe I'm about to say this, and knock on wood, throw salt over my shoulder, or whatever I need to do, but this isn't hard. It's like once my mind got on board, my body is just following suit. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">My mom asked for Taco Bell tonight. Now, I LOVE me some Doritos Locos Tacos and Nacho Fries. I mean, it's true love. Yum, yum, yum. Well, even though I could have had some healthier things from TB, I didn't order anything except a Diet Pepsi. It's like a true miracle over here! </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I decided that eating out sounded good since I was starving so I headed to Subway because I knew that I could make good choices there. Guess what? The stars are aligned against me in Cushing as far as eating out goes... they were closed because they had no bread. Subway. NO BREAD. What? How does that even happen? So, instead of turning back to TB, or another fast food place, I came home instead and had a homemade turkey sandwich. It was far less points and I was/am pretty dang proud of myself!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I'm like the Little Engine That Could... I think I can, I think I can, I think I can. I've got a huge hill to climb but I'm climbing!!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>FOOD - DAY 9:</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">B<b><u>reakfast:</u></b> Back to my favorite from last week, peanut butter toast. It's a good thing the toast is warm so the peanut butter can go farther. Lol. 2 slices of Wonder Whole Grain white bread (3 points) and 1 T. of PB (3 points). Extra yummy this morning. Breakfast total: 6 points.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Lunch:</u></b> Chicken Tacos. OMG. These were so tasty. I had shredded, cooked chicken breast, seasoned with Taco Bell (ironically!) taco seasoning (0 points), FF cheddar cheese (0 points), chili beans (0 points) and 2 Mission Carb Balance white tortillas (2 points each = 4 points), topped with 2 T. of Tostitos Queso Blanco dip (2 points). Lunch total was 6 points and it was sooo good!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Dinner:</u></b> Turkey Sandwich made with 2 slices of Wonder Whole Grain white bread (3 points), Oscar Mayer Oven Roasted Turkey breast (1 point), 1 slice of Sargento Ultra Thin Provolone cheese (1 point) and mustard (0 points). I also had some baby dill pickles (0 points) and about 6 Ritz cracker chips for (1 point). I was absolutely going to have 21 of those suckers for 4 points but then I discovered... I don't like them. Blech. So, I stopped at 6 and was fine. Dinner total: 6 points.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Snack:</u></b> I usually don't eat a snack or if I do, it's only once a day, but today I had two. I just needed them. During the afternoon, I had a Cocoa Krispy Treat (4 points) and then this evening I had 4 Chocolate Graham squares (2 points). Worth every point when I really needed a treat! Snack total: 6 points.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Oddly, each of my meals, plus my snacks were all 6 points today. Lol. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">27 meals down, 1068 to go. There's no stopping me now!</span><br />
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<img alt="Motivational Fitness Quotes for Women" src="https://i.pinimg.com/564x/e2/2d/c5/e22dc54e23ae27716166578937f09564.jpg" />Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-15640101019947012002019-03-11T20:39:00.001-07:002019-03-11T20:39:55.402-07:00Day 8 of 365<span style="font-size: large;">I am learning every day that food challenges are around all the corners, and I'm also learning how to consciously choose what I'm going to put in my mouth. It's empowering!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Tonight we had big board meeting. Every year, the FACS class cooks the most amazing brick oven pizza for the meeting. (Side note: We are the only high school in the United States with a real brick oven in their FACS room. We came up with the idea during an all night FCCLA lock in and applied for a grant and got it!) This year, not only did they make some amazing pizza, but they have been trying out recipes to make and sell monster chocolate chip cookies in our concession stand next year. They finally decided on a product and brought all of us monster cookies to try. So, I had a choice to make in what I was going to put into my body. It wasn't a matter of will power. I didn't feel like I couldn't keep from eating the stuff. I just simply chose not to have it all. I ate supper at home for 6 points and had a monster cookie at the meeting. I was satisfied and didn't feel deprived at all. Yay!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>FOOD - DAY 8 OF 365:</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Breakfast:</u></b> 1 of the biscuits I made yesterday (it was not good. It needed WAY more salt. It tasted like... nothing. Blech). It was only 3 points, but I do not recommend. I'm going to try another recipe this weekend. In addition, I had an egg (0 points) and 4 pieces of Hormel pre-cooked bacon (3 points) for a total of 6 points.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Lunch: Chicken Fried Rice (1 cup for 6 points), corn (0 points) and green lima beans (0 points) for a total of 6 points. So good!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Dinner: 1 Salmon Patty (3 points), corn (0 points) and WW scalloped potatoes (3 points) for a total of 6 points. It was delicious!!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Snack: 1 Monster Cookie. Now, I had a hard time figuring out points on this, but I found a Toll House Monster Cookie so I went with that at 8 points. Way higher points than any snack I would normally have, but it's okay because I still have points even after eating it. And man, it was totally worth it.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">All in all, a successful day. I still have a good attitude and do not fear failure. That is HUGE for me!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">24 meals down, 1071 to go. I've got this!</span><br />
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<img alt="Invest in your health! best motivational quotes // Shakeology // fitness inspo // health and diet quotes // best fitness quotes // Beachbody // Beachbody Blog" src="https://i.pinimg.com/564x/22/ef/1e/22ef1ec86ca64c911c3c9caec85f40c7.jpg" />Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-38033069728059421202019-03-10T20:51:00.002-07:002019-03-10T21:08:15.030-07:00Day 7 of 365<span style="font-size: large;">I made it a week! Yahoo! And what a week it was. I had ups and downs, some major food challenges and a serious learning curve going on... but I LOST 10 LBS! TEN! What? </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I've said for years, "I can't lose weight". "My metabolism is zero". "I think my thyroid isn't working right". Guess what I discovered this week? Those are excuses, not reasons. Now, I'm positive that those are real reasons for some people, but this week proved that I am not one of those people. It proved that all along, my heart wasn't in it.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I'm not sure how it happened, but one day, it just clicked in my head... and in my heart. Poof! I was going to change my life. Yes, there is a little doubt still that I may not stick it out. That little devil always rears his ugly head. I realize that I'm not going to lose 10 lbs every week, and likely there will be weeks that I don't lose, and even gain. But, seriously y'all. I really think I'm going to do it. OMG. I'M REALLY DOING THIS! </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I spent all day today cooking for the week ahead. My new normal is grocery shop on Saturday and cook on Sunday. Since I work two jobs, plus tutor in the evenings, there isn't room for much variation in my week. I get it, but man, that makes my social life sound really lame. Haha! You want to see me? Come over on Sunday and cook with me.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Tomorrow begins week 2... I'm totally up for the challenge!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>FOOD - DAY 7 OF 365</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Breakfast: 3 waffles made from Kodiak cakes (1/4 cup mix, plus 1 egg, plus a little water to make it the right consistency = 2.5 points). Add 1/4 cup sugar-free syrup for 1 point and it's 3.5 points total. It was... decent. The waffles tasted great. The syrup is not my favorite. I made more of the mix up into pancakes (1 point each) for the coming week. I'm thinking maybe with just peanut butter or something. I want to love them. We'll see.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Lunch: 2 cups of canned Red Beans with some Fat Free cheddar cheese melted on top. Sooo good and was 0 points. How can you knock zero??</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Dinner: 1 salmon patty (salmon, egg, crackers = 3 points), scalloped potatoes (a Weight Watchers recipe I found on Pinterest... oh, so delish. They seriously tasted like fried potatoes but 1/2 cup was only 3 points!), cottage cheese cup (3 points), green lima beans (0 points), and corn (0 points). I was starving after cooking all day and smelling all the good things I cooked. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Snack: 1 Blueberry Muffin (a recipe I got off Pinterest and tweaked the ingredients for 2.5 points), 1 tsp butter (1 point). This could be so delicious if you used sugar. Lol. I used Splenda. It's okay. Not the greatest, but the farther into the muffin I got, the better I liked it.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I feel like I'm going to weigh heavy in the morning... for some reason salmon always makes me retain water. Odd since it's a fish. Haha! Oh well. If I do, it's all good and I won't be discouraged! </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">21 meals down, 1074 to go. #iwilldothis #neverbackdown #getyourheartinthegame</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><img alt=" " src="https://i.pinimg.com/564x/20/b2/fd/20b2fd38f764eb2f388aab8d0ffde66d.jpg" /><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-59747077994571109302019-03-09T19:31:00.001-08:002019-03-09T19:31:08.082-08:00Day 6 of 365<span style="font-size: large;">Today was party day! My mom turned 80 yesterday so we had a birthday bash AT A PIZZA PLACE today. Talk about a food challenge.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I prepped all week. This is a fairly small pizza chain so I couldn't find any nutrition info online for them. However, I did find it for several other pizza chains so I compared them all and found a happy medium, hoping that this one fit into that mold. I was ecstatic to discover that a pepperoni calzone was only 8 points... until I found out they don't have calzones. LOL. So, after looking and comparing all week, I decided on soup and salad. Oh well. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Then there was cake. OMG. It looked so good and chocolate cake is my weakness for sure. I wasn't going to have any, but then I got to thinking how this was a lifestyle change, and at some point in my life, I'm going to have cake. So, I cut 1/4 of a piece and enjoyed every single bite. And that was enough to be satisfied. It was delicious too!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I wasn't very hungry for dinner (thank goodness after all those points at lunch), so it was an easy choice tonight. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">All in all, I'm feeling quite proud of myself for navigating such tough waters and coming out on the other side a winner! #icandothis</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>FOOD - DAY 6 OF 365:</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><u><b>Breakfast:</b></u> 1 Peanut Butter toast (3 points), 4 slices of Hormel ready to eat bacon (3 points) = 6 points and it was delicious. Good combo!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Lunch:</u></b> The big one. Lol. 1 cup of potato soup (6 points), salad (7 points). Here's what I had in my unconventional "salad": cottage cheese (3 points), boiled eggs (0 points), sunflower seeds (1 point), croutons (1 point), low fat cheese (1 point), 6 black olives (1 point) and broccoli (0 points). No lettuce or tomatoes in my salad! All for 13 points. Not terrible.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Dinner:</u></b> 1 cup of Great Northern Beans (0 points), 1 cottage cheese snack cup (3 points).</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Snack:</u></b> CAKE! A tiny, 1/4 piece but it was soooo worth it (4 points).</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">All in all, it was a good day, I still have points left over and I really am feeling "in it to win it"!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">18 meals down... 1077 to go. #onmyway</span><br />
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<img alt="~~pinned from site directly~~ . . . 3 MONTHS FROM NOW More" src="https://i.pinimg.com/564x/ce/0b/ee/ce0beee91834b64282692b99f5fb4746.jpg?b=t" /><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-53960556950854793502019-03-09T19:14:00.001-08:002019-03-11T20:45:14.158-07:00Day 5 of 365<span style="font-size: large;">A year in the life... Day 5.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">It's been a whirlwind! Yesterday was my mother's 80th birthday. Of course I had to take her out to eat. You're only 80 once! That being said, I told her I was taking her to the local family restaurant and I had done my research. I was all set to spend 15 points for dinner and have catfish, baked potato and green beans. Yum!! Unfortunately... she decided she wanted Mexican food and since it was her birthday, that's where we went. Total game changer. YIKES! But, I did my best, and turns out, I still had rollover points. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I was seriously worried that I'd be up when I weighed this morning due to all the salt in the food (not to mention the FAT), but thankfully, I was down another pound! Yahoo! 8.4 lbs since Monday. It's a miracle y'all! I can't even believe it. I NEVER lose weight. The struggle is so real. But I'm here to attest... this is working for me! </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>FOOD - DAY 5:</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Breakfast:</u></b> Finally a satisfying breakfast!! Success! Peanut Butter Toast (2 slices of Wonder whole-grain white bread = 3 points... doubled since I had two of them, so 6 points). </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Lunch:</u></b> 2 Soft Tacos (2 Mission Carb Balance tortillas (these are soft, white and delicious!) 2 points each, 99% Fat Free ground turkey (0 points), taco seasoning (0 points), Kraft Fat Free cheddar cheese (0 points) = 4 points total.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Dinner:</u></b> The Mexican food mentioned above... hold on tight. It's a killer. 7 tortilla chips (3 points), 1/4 cup white queso (3 points), 2 tostadas with beans and cheese (14 points) = 20 points. TWENTY! Ugh!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Snacks:</u></b> 1 Kiwi (0 points) and Grapes (0 points). Let me just say that this, too, is almost a miracle. I have never been a fruit eater.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">All that, and I still had points left at the end of the day. 100% success!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><img alt="Weight loss motivational quotes that will inspire you to start your healthy journey! "Weight loss is the body healing itself, both inside and out" - Fitness motivation | TheShapeWithin.com #weightlosstips" src="https://i.pinimg.com/564x/9e/fb/13/9efb1325da5a126c48e2a034af8a1a24.jpg" /></span>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-33753865396439972082019-03-07T20:14:00.001-08:002019-03-07T20:14:50.140-08:00Day 4 of 365<span style="font-size: large;">Today was a DAY! Ugh. Day 4 of 365. It's days like today that would normally make me quit. I was starving all day, I felt like my sugar was a little out of whack, and when I stopped to pick up supper from KFC, I discovered that Cushing's KFC doesn't have the grilled chicken because "they don't have a grill." Of course they don't. #storyofmylife</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Just my luck! Without having nutrition info at hand, I had to just wing it (ha! wing it... get it? chicken?). I ordered a KFC bowl. When I got home I found out that sucker was 17 points! Holy Moly!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">All that being said, I still had a good attitude today and absolutely wanted to make good choices. I had a couple of moments of weakness (that chicken bowl came with a delicious looking cookie that I threw away), but so far, I've survived and have points left over. PTL! I need all the rollover points I can get because my mom's 80th bday is tomorrow and we are going out to eat and then Saturday is her bday party... with PIZZA & CAKE! Oh my...</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">FOOD - DAY 4 OF 365</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Breakfast: 2 pieces of Wonder whole grain white bread, toasted (3 points) and 1 T. of peanut butter (3 points). It was BY FAR the best breakfast I've had so far. SUCCESS!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Lunch: Spaghetti (7 points), green beans (0 points) and butter beans (0 points). SUCCESS!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Dinner: KFC Chicken bowl with most chicken removed for less points (I'm calling it 13 points). SEMI-SUCCESS! Lol</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Snack: Kellogg's Rice Krispy Treat bar (4 points - too many points for the small bar!) SEMI-SUCCESS! </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">To sum it up, I hope tomorrow is a way better food day, I'm tired of all the things I cooked last Sunday, and I'm still hunting for the perfect sweet breakfast. BUT, I'm still in it to win it, I threw away a hot, delicious chocolate chip cookie, and I'm still under my points for the day. Absolute SUCCESS as far as I'm concerned! 12 meals down, 1083 to go. #ivegotthis #neverbackdown #bringingsexyback</span><br />
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<img alt="Motivation ðð»" src="https://i.pinimg.com/564x/a4/a0/24/a4a024a609dd800bb0b839591b343c8e.jpg" />Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-72944620613095298262019-03-06T17:32:00.001-08:002019-03-06T17:37:00.643-08:00Day 3 of 365<span style="font-size: large;">Day 3... 9 meals down... 1086 to go. So far, so good. My body feels... skinny. Haha! I'll take it!</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">I love, love, love to eat out. I love not having to cook or clean up the mess from cooking. I was TOTALLY tempted to grab fast food tonight. I was starving, and I really wanted either Taco Bell or KFC. I mean, I have lots of points left over for the day and I could have had it, but I just felt like it wouldn't be a great choice for me. I'm down 6.2 lbs and I want to stay that way! Fast food has so much sodium in it that I knew it would make me retain water and I'd be sad when I weighed in the morning.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">So, I forced myself to drive to the gas station and get a Diet Pepsi instead and then I came straight home. And once here, it was easy to eat right. WIN, WIN, WIN!</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>FOOD - DAY 3 OF 365:</u></b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><u>Breakfast:</u> I've still not hit the breakfast jackpot yet. That's my struggle bus for sure. I ate low-sugar Quaker oatmeal for breakfast for 5 points. It was okay, but didn't quite hit the spot. Still searching for the breakfast solution...</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><u>Lunch:</u> I had two soft tacos for a total of 4 points! Y'all, who says you won't get full on Weight Watchers?? I was stuffed. And everything I ate (taco meat, beans, fat free cheese, and Mission Carb Smart tortillas) was 0 points except the tortillas. Although they cost almost $5.00 a package, let me tell you, they are worth EVERY penny. They are "white" (I hate wheat tortillas), soft and delicious. YUMMO!</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><u>Dinner:</u> Leftovers: Succotash (6 points for 1 cup), cottage cheese (3 points) and butter beans (0 points). Delicious 9 point dinner and I'm stuffed to the gills.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">My attitude is good, and my mindset is even better. I'm in it to win it!</span><br />
<br />
<img alt="::: Visit TheWeighWeWere.com ::: Find InspirWeighTion and motivational quotes and read real life weight loss success stories from around the web!" src="https://i.pinimg.com/564x/5b/d2/e2/5bd2e27269da0d7c5c363df6efe23746.jpg" />Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-85360628969240967562019-03-05T21:21:00.002-08:002019-03-06T17:35:30.294-08:00Day 2 of 365<span style="font-size: large;">I DID IT! I survived Day 2 of 365. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">When I woke up this morning, I got on the scale. I was down FIVE pounds. What?! Talk about empowering. It's amazing how 5 measly pounds will make you feel "in it to win in". I felt like a diet beast all day. Haha!</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">I will say that I am learning a lot about food. Before yesterday, I absolutely could not have eaten spaghetti without bread and butter. It just goes together. I'm a HUGE bread eater. I literally like bread of some sort with every single meal. That is most definitely going to be a hard part of this journey.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>FOOD - DAY 2 OF 365:</u></b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><u>Breakfast:</u> 2 chocolate pumpkin muffins. 3 points each - 6 points. Not bad for breakfast. I love, love sweets for breakfast. I used a sugar-free Pillsbury cake mix and combined it with one can of pure pumpkin. You guys... DELISH and only 3 points! WIN!</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><u>Lunch:</u> Succotash. 1 cup - 6 points, and green beans - 0 points. Y'all. Succotash is the BOMB and it has so many zero point things in it!</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><u>Snack:</u> I discovered that while I'm at work, I HAVE to have a snack. At home? Not so much. But at work, that 3:00 slump hit me hard. I found these great Enlightened Fudge Bars at Sprouts yesterday. Only 2 points and not bad at all.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><u>Dinner:</u> I was STARVING. I had more spaghetti than I'd originally planned to. I used the Kraft green box spaghetti mix and it's only 7 points per serving. The ground turkey in the sauce was 0 points. But alas, I couldn't stop at one serving so I had 1 1/2 servings which brought my total to 10. I also had 1/2 cup of low-fat cottage cheese at 3 points, and corn at 0 points. Dinner was still a complete success at 13 total points.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">So, on target for the day with points left over. Day 2... a complete SUCCESS!! 1,089 meals to go...</span><br />
<br />
<img alt="Weight loss motivation With optimal health often comes clarity of thought. Click now to visit my blog for your free fitness solutions!" src="https://i.pinimg.com/564x/73/a6/95/73a695d7a15fe6c88c1c6d46d1131d6f.jpg?b=t" />Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-82871473093788293722019-03-04T17:06:00.003-08:002019-03-06T17:34:12.551-08:00Day 1 of 365... Let's Get This Party Started!<span style="font-size: large;">Last July I saw a movie that would eventually change my life. I knew it at the time (see my previous blog post), but just didn't know exactly how it would change me. So... my blog is titled, "You might as well make lemonade"... and I truly believe that I have "made lemonade" these past 10 years since my divorce. I have looked adversity in the face and risen above many times. It hasn't always been easy, that's for certain. Sometimes my lemonade was sour, salty, bitter and watered out, and there were definitely times I felt like I'd crash and burn. But, hey! I'm still here and making it!</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">In July, I had a revelation that my head was my problem. It screamed insecurities at me. I let it tell me all sorts of ugly things and I had let myself believe them... for years. I knew in July that I had to figure my head out before anything else in my life would change. I also realized then that it wasn't what was on the outside that really counts... it's what's on the inside that matters. I struggled to accept myself as I was, regardless of circumstances, size, shape, looks, personality, etc. But at the same time, I wanted to be healthy, and to be a better me both inside and out. I really began to work on myself, and on my insecurities, my confidence. But I never could get that one part of my head on the straight and narrow... the part that yelled at me that I couldn't lose weight, that I never would, that I didn't deserve to. Then suddenly, in the past couple of weeks, it finally all just came together and "clicked" in my head.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">This morning marked the start of my new life. Not just a "diet", but a complete change of mindset. And for the first time in years and years... I know I CAN do this, and I definitely DESERVE it. I've started out on a one year journey to greatness... a year to improve myself, in a lot of ways. A year from now, you'll see a "new" me, at least on the outside. The inside me will always be the ME you know... hopefully with a few improvements there too but y'all, I'm about as real as it gets. No fakeness here and that won't change! Love me or leave me, either one is okay. It's all about the journey, and those that make the journey with me will be the ones that I need in my life.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">With that being said, I'm changing things up a little bit. I'm trying to be transparent, because, well, that's just how I roll. Instead of "You might as well make lemonade", my new phrase is going to be "You might as well make DIET lemonade". For YEARS, I haven't "really" tried to lose weight. Oh, I've put my hand to it a little here and a little there over the years, but not with true effort. And why not? Well, for quite a few reasons, some being more expedient to talk about than others. There's just some dirty laundry that needs to stay... buried... for lack of a better word. Let's just say that people's words can be more hurtful than they know and can stay with you for a lifetime if you let them. It's time to let them go.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">I've done some soul-searching these past few years, and especially since last July, and I've made some changes for myself... some popular with others, some not. And THAT'S OKAY! I'm doing me, you do you, and we'll get along just fine.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<b><span style="font-size: large;">For Day 1 of my 365 day journey, here are some observations:</span></b><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">1. I like grapes way better than I thought I did.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">2. I don't like Egg Substitute. Blech.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">3. If I eat the right things, I'm really not hungry between meals.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">4. Who knew that you could eat SO MUCH food and it be legal??</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">5. If you put your water in a cute Rae Dunn refillable water bottle, you drink a lot more than when it's in a boring old cup.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">6. I have no clue how I can feel this full, be on target with my diet and yet still lose weight... but "they" say it works.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">7. It's amazing what a good mindset will do for your confidence. Wow. I had no idea. I honestly had a great day, in public with zero insecurities. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">You guys... come ride this train with me. I need all the encouragement I can get! (Just don't side-eye judge me if you see me eating something you think I shouldn't... this is a year-long journey and no one is perfect for a whole freakin' year.)</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<b><u><span style="font-size: large;">FOOD JOURNAL, DAY 1 of 365:</span></u></b><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u><span style="font-size: medium;"><br /></span></u></b>
<u><b>Breakfast:</b></u> 2 Eggs (0 points), 1/4 C of Fat Free cheddar cheese (0 points), 2 slices of Canadian Bacon (1 pt), 1 Mission Carb Balance tortilla (2 points) and water. <b>3 points of SUCCESS!!</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><u><b>Lunch:</b></u> 1 Small bowl of Chicken Tortilla Soup from Chick Fil A (5 points), 8 regular chicken nuggets (6 points), and unsweetened tea (0 points). <b>11 points of SUCCESS!!</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><u><b>Snack:</b></u> Grapes (my new favorite) (0 points). <b>0 points of SUCCESS!!</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><u><b>Dinner:</b></u> 24 bite-sized Tostitos chips (4 points), 1/2 Cup of ground turkey w/ taco seasoning (0 points), 1/2 cup of chili beans (0 points), 1/4 cup of corn (0 points), Fat Free shredded cheddar cheese (0 points). <b>4 points of SUCCESS!!</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Y'all, I'm STUFFED. And I still have points I can eat today if I want. I can't imagine... Lol.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">So far, so good. 3 meals down out of 1,095... I CAN DO THIS!</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">It's been a good, good day.</span><br />
<br />
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<br />Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-40029083150524608402018-07-22T21:43:00.001-07:002021-07-17T19:01:28.521-07:00I Feel Pretty<br><br><div style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><br></div><br><br><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I saw a great movie last night and it got me to thinking...</span><br><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Things just got real over here!</span><br><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">When I was a little girl, there was a time when I thought everyone was my friend, the way that most kids do. When I went to a new place, I didn\"t think, "What if they don\"t like me?" Instead, I would think, "Oh yay! New friends!" Sadly, as the years passed and I became self-aware, I became insecure. I tried hard to put on a good front, and for the most part, people thought I was friendly and outgoing. Occasionally though, someone would see through that facade.</span><br><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">One year in Colorado, my insecure flag was flying high and although I was around some new people, I was only talking with my "already" friends. A guy I had just met said that I was "snobby". Snobby? Oh, no. Just extremely insecure. Thankfully, he saw my true self and we became fast friends. That year may have been the most fun I ever had at the Colorado camp outs, and I made some life-long friends.</span><br><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">As I got older, I found security in things I was good at. Whether it be working at a job, having company and being a good hostess, being organized and helping with Christmas programs, volunteering at the school, or whatever. Anything I could feel "good" at, gave me a "place" and I didn\"t have to feel awkward. Want help at a party? Invite me! I\"ll be the first one to jump in and help because it gives me a purpose. Now, don\"t get me wrong. The insecurity was still there... and sometimes it was a huge, roaring monster in my head. And, sadly, it made me less of a wife, mother, sister, daughter and friend. Can you imagine the confidence my own daughter would have if she\"d had a mom that was uber secure and confident and not afraid of being "less"?</span><br><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">After my divorce, I knew I had to go back to work. And let me tell you, that insecure monster was BIG. But, God came through for me with the perfect starter job that I could be good at... a Hallmark Card representative. On days that my head was roaring too loudly, I could walk in, start working and instantly feel better about myself.</span><br><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Over the years, I\"d always found security at the school, even if it was just volunteering in my children\"s classrooms, or taking them and their friends to ballgames, etc. I was a good "school mom". After a bit, I was blessed with a job there, and thankfully, I have found confidence and self-assurance in it. I LOVE my job and am so thankful for it. Sometimes, just like with Hallmark, my head will be roaring and all I have to do is step in the doors of the school and I\"m calm, and in my element. </span><br><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">In the 9 years since my divorce, I have really struggled with personal self-confidence. My hair is ugly. I\"m too fat. I talk too loud. Time and time again, I wonder why anyone would even want to be friends with me. I won\"t get up and walk across a crowded room. I won\"t let someone take my picture. I won\"t branch out of my inner circle. I just don\"t feel good about myself. Ever so often, I\"ll have a "good" day. I feel good, it\"s a good hair day, I may have on a new outfit, or maybe I have new make up on. Those days are the best. Those are the days that I have a spring in my step and I\"m "in it to win in" and I feel "likeable". Unfortunately, those days don\"t come often. But, once again, I\"m extremely good at hiding it and pray all the time that people don\"t realize how insecure I really am.</span><br><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">So, about that movie. It\"s called, "I feel pretty".</span><br><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The premise is this: She\"s chubby and not quite in style. She\"s insecure and not going places in life. She has a small friend group and that\"s about it. She\"s super intimidated by the beautiful people. Her greatest wish is to be one of them... to be beautiful. Well, she falls and hits her head. When she comes to, what she sees in the mirror is an extremely beautiful, thin, amazing woman. It immediately changes her behavior. When she\"d normally hang back and not even let someone open the door for her, she suddenly thinks everyone is opening the door for her, even when they aren\"t. She thinks everyone sees that she\"s drop dead gorgeous. She joins all sorts of things that are way out of her norm. She talks to everyone without reservation. The thing is... she\"s exactly how she\"s always been, but her HEAD is different. Her head sees that she\"s beautiful, amazing. If you haven\"t seen it... trust me, you want to. It\"s got such a great message.</span><br><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The thing that struck me is... I do the same thing. My head is the problem... not me. I\"m Sandy, regardless of what I look like, regardless of my size or what my hair looks like or if I\"m frumpy and unfashionable. And you know what? If people don\"t like me, that\"s okay. I don\"t have to be super thin. I don\"t have to be in style if I don\"t want to. I can talk loud. AND IT\"S OKAY!! What a revelation. </span><br><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I can\"t stop thinking about the movie, and I really feel like this is going to change my world somehow. I resolve TODAY to change my head... because I\"m worth it.</span><br><br><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span><br><img alt=" " height="640" src="https://i.pinimg.com/564x/73/3e/24/733e24b76769bf8a1462a80bfacf9775.jpg" width="426">Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-24088119663914086712018-02-11T14:17:00.000-08:002021-07-17T19:00:54.999-07:00The Chicken Whisperer<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">First of all, I should state that I am terribly afraid of chickens. As a matter of fact, I'm pretty scared of all
birds. Seriously. And just my luck… they are drawn to me. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">After several "bird" instances and a divorce, I moved to town with my kids and thought I
had escaped the fowl life.</span><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">I only had two
trees in my yard and my bird exposure was pretty limited.</span><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">I started feeling
complacent and even hung up a bird feeder, just in case they were hungry.</span><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"> T</span><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">he birds
and I were living a peaceful existence, each of us minding our own business.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Then it happened... my neighbors behind me got chickens. Every
day and night I could hear them. “Cluck,
cluck, cluck”. It was like one of those
horror movies where you could hear the birds before they attacked. “Cluck, cluck, cluck”. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">When I would mow the grass, they’d come to the fence and
watch me with their beady little eyes. As I mowed along the fence
row, they’d follow me to the end of their pen.
Back and forth, back and forth.
It was creepy. “Cluck, cluck,
cluck”. Follow, follow, follow. “Cluck, cluck, cluck”. Follow, follow,
follow.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">As time went on, we got used to each other. Don’t get me wrong, there is no way I was
going to stick my fingers through the fence, but I got to where I kind of liked
their little clucking and I figured out that the reason they were following me
on the mower was because they liked the grass clippings I was shooting into
their pen. I even began greeting them
when I went out into the backyard. “Hi
chickens!” “Cluck, cluck, cluck”, they’d
respond. We were getting along
smashingly well, but then came t<i>he great escape</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Have you ever seen the movie, “Chicken Run”? The gist of the movie is that the chickens
are trying to figure out a way to escape before the farmer eats them. Now, I don’t think my neighbors were planning
to eat these chickens, but they did eat their eggs. I, however, am allergic to eggs and don’t eat
them. Do you think the chickens could
sense this? Did they like this about
me? Sometimes I wondered.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">One day I glanced out my back window and saw a white chicken
in my yard. I called my neighbor and
told her she had an escapee, and she came over with her daughter and corralled the chicken and took it home.
A few days later, a different chicken was in my yard. This time, my neighbor wasn’t home, so my
daughter and I (Sheridan doing most of the work and me, armed with a broom, only getting as close as
absolutely necessary) herded the chicken into a corner and encouraged it to fly
back in through the hole it came out of.
They boarded up the hole and that was that. Until it wasn’t. The chickens obviously regrouped and came up
with plan B. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">About a week later, the white chicken was back in my
yard. By this time, I’d name her Houdini
because she truly was a great escape artist. Each
time she’d get out, I’d call my neighbor, she would get one of her daughters
and they would come over and commence to corralling the chicken. It was like the Great Rat Race. Houdini would run to the left, they’d move to
the left, and just before they could grab her, she’d run to the right. They’d move to the right, and just before
they could grab her, she’d fly up in the air.
It was really hysterical, all the while being just a tad terrorizing to me at the same time.
Finally, they’d get the chicken and take her back home. That scenario happened time and time
again. After a time, Houdini started
bringing Houdoneit with her. They just
loved my grass. Someone must have told
them the old adage, “The grass is always greener on the other side of the
fence”.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"> One day, after my neighbors had succeeded in corralling Houdini and Houdoneit, yet again, I
glanced out the window and saw… THREE chickens in my yard. They were multiplying! I got a little hysterical for a moment,
thinking about the off-chance that they might all get out of their pen and into
my back yard. How would I ever leave my house again?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"> I sent my neighbor a text and she
said they’d come get them later. I
forgot about them for a while, until I went to shut my blinds for the
night. I glanced out and saw that my
yard was once again chicken-free and that all the chickens had gone into their
coop to roost for the night. I was just
about to close up shop and head to bed, and then I heard it: “Cluck, cluck, cluck”. Oh no.
There was one more left out there in the dark… <i>in my yard</i>. She sounded sad,
lost and lonely. “Cluck, cluck, cluck”. I couldn’t help myself. I went outside, peeked around the side of my
house and there she was. A HUGE black
chicken. As crazy as it sounds, that chicken was sending me some mom telepathy. I was
compelled to follow her; she sounded so sad.
I knew that all she wanted was to go to roost with her fellow girl
chickens but she couldn’t figure out how to get back home. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"> Just then, I had some sort of out-of-body experience. I couldn’t stop myself. I slowly followed her around to the front of
my house talking quietly and calmly to her.
I told her that I was really afraid of her, but I knew she needed
help. I told her that if she’d get on my
porch and be still, that I would pick her up and take her home. Yes, I know that sounds like the ramblings of
a crazy woman, but hey, you do what you’ve gotta do. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"> As we rounded the corner to my front yard,
I’ll be danged. That chicken climbed up
on my porch, turned around, looked me straight in the eye and stood perfectly
still. As unbelievable as it sounds,
that chicken was giving me a chance to help her. So, as promised, I reached down to pick her
up, all the while asking her really nicely to please not bite me. She never moved a muscle. I picked her up and cradled her in my arms
like a cat - I mean, obviously I had no chicken carrying experience – and
started walking. She never squawked or
ruffled a feather. I carried her all the
way home and put her in the pen and she was perfectly still the whole
time. Once I let her down, she turned to
look at me as if she were saying, “Thanks for the ride!”, and into the coop she
went.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br />
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> I have no explanation except to say, she loved me, obviously. Like I said… <i>I am the chicken whisperer</i>. “Cluck, cluck, cluck”.</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-34180425947479316452017-09-19T20:26:00.003-07:002021-07-17T19:00:31.306-07:00Old Hands<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>OLD HANDS</b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
When my son was little, we were at church one day and he said, "Mom, Bro. Port is really old." I asked him, "Why do you say that?" And he replied, "Because he has old hands."</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
I stopped for a moment to consider this brother's hands. They were wrinkled, and his fingers were a little twisted. His hands were weathered, with some age spots. I looked down at my own hands. They were smooth, creamy... young. I thought about the difference in our ages, lives, experiences. He might have had "old hands" but they were kind, and the wisdom he had was something to seek after. I hoped that one day when I had old hands that I might have a quarter of that wisdom.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
When my dad was still alive, I noticed his hands many times after that instance. His hands were tanned, strong, steady, and kind. As the years passed, I noticed the age spots begin to creep in. As Dad got sick, I noticed the tanned hands were pale. The strong hands were weak. The steady hands were shaking. But they were always kind and that wisdom... he had it. Again, something to strive for in my life.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
I posted a picture on Facebook tonight. I wasn't happy to discover that my hands have age spots on them. I considered them and I thought, "They are tan. They are strong. They are steady. But are they kind? Do I have wisdom?"</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
I'm going to try to be happy with my "old hands". If they get pale, okay. If they get weak, alright. If they get shaky, so be it. I'm going to worry about the important things instead. I'm going to strive for kindness, and for wisdom. I think we need more of both in this world.</div>
Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-49629767095340223792017-08-22T20:49:00.000-07:002021-07-17T19:00:16.708-07:00It Didn’t Go As Planned… And That’s Okay!<br><br><div style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><br><br></div><br><br><br><b><span style="font-size: large;">I had an epiphany the other day...</span></b><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><b><br></b><br>I have no idea if I can put my thoughts into words. </span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">When I was 11, my brother and my sister both got married within two weeks of each other. For me, the only child left at home, life changed drastically. We went from a family of 5 at home, to a family of 3. Change brought many differences in our lifestyle. We ate out a lot more, did more "fun" things, traveled more, etc. </span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">I\"m not exactly sure why, but all of those changes, differences, made me forget what life had been like before. As an adult, I can barely remember "family" life with my brother and sister at home. I can\"t remember ever sitting around a table eating supper together. I can\"t remember playing outside with them. I can\"t remember doing ANY family things together. I remember individual events. I remember time spent with them, individually, but the actual family memories are gone. I\"ve often wondered if it was some kind of self-preservation... maybe a way of protecting my feelings when they moved on.</span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">8 years ago, I had another life-altering experience. I became a single (divorced) woman again. Life completely changed, in the blink of an eye. Suddenly, I had to figure things out on my own. I had to go back to work. I had to figure out how to raise my kids. I went from having over 2000 visitors a year to 10. There were many, many changes. As time went on, something very similar happened to me, like it did when I was a kid. I forgot. I honestly could not remember so much of what "life" was like when I was married. I remember tons of events and experiences, but general life is hard to remember. One day, I realized that I couldn\"t even think of one snack my ex had liked to eat. How odd that I\"d forget something like that after 17 years of marriage. Was it again a form of self-preservation? </span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">About a year ago, I found our old home movies, but realized I had nothing to play them on, as our Mini DV camcorder had disappeared. I tried to buy some kind of adapter, but they just aren\"t out there for my kind of camera. I couldn\"t afford to have the cassettes put onto a DVD at that point, so I just kind of forgot about it for the time being. </span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">A couple of weeks ago, my foot kicked something under my bed. Now, first let me say that I don\"t keep hardly anything under the beds. I have 4 paintings and a wedding dress under mine. But that day... there was something else. My video camera! I have no explanation as to how it got there except to say, "God gave it back to me." I began to watch videos...</span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">I saw family Christmases, birthdays, fun times. I got to see my Daddy again. I watched my little kids as they grew, year to year. I saw us fishing, climbing trees, playing in the snow. I saw tickles and laughs and hugs. I saw a FAMILY. </span><span style="font-size: large;">After all this time, I remembered the good times. I remembered that things weren\"t always bad... that they were good for a lot of years. And that made me happy.</span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">I realize now that satan, once again, was a thief. He stole my memories from me. He made me feel like an idiot... like I\"d been deceived by lies for 17 years and that I\"d never had a happy home. Like it was wasted time and I had nothing good to show for it. But you know what? He was WRONG. </span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">Different isn\"t bad. Life is a beautiful thing, and I shouldn\"t be so afraid of change. God can take the ugliest things and bring beauty from the ashes. I\"m a better person today for the things I\"ve been through. I hope I can learn this lesson as I move forward in life. I want to embrace change and never, ever forget. But I also want to never be afraid to remember.</span><br><br><br><br><img alt="Always something new around the corner." src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/30/9b/59/309b5983097f67b35c45a96746114ad3.jpg">Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-34368947245838002842016-12-30T21:28:00.003-08:002021-07-17T18:59:17.531-07:00Being PresentRamblings...<br />
<br />
For the past two days, I've been consumed by the phrase "being present". Being present... what does that really mean? Don't I live in the present every day?<br />
<br />
For starters, I've never had a problem going to sleep. Many of my friends have struggled with that. I know people that lie awake at night, dwelling on troubles, issues, problems, even just stupid stuff. When my ex left, for three nights I laid awake, unable to sleep. At all. I wondered what would happen to me and the kids. Where would we go? What would we do? Would we survive this loss? On the fourth night, as I lay there worrying, God spoke to me. It was so clear in my mind. I felt like He said, "If you got up right this minute, could you fix anything? At the present time, is there anything at all that you could do, right now, in the middle of the night?" And honestly, the answer was "No". There truly wasn't anything I could do right then. And I felt a calmness, and a peace come over me, and I closed my eyes and went to sleep. That was the last night that I remember having trouble sleeping.<br />
<br />
Many times since then, as I've lain down to sleep, I've had a worry or two creep into my thoughts. And immediately, I will ask myself, "If I get up right now, is there anything at all I can do about this situation?" Sometimes, the answer is "yes", like make a to-do list or something but almost always, the answer is "No". On the rare occasion that the answer happens to be "yes", I will get right up, do what I need to do, then lay back down and go right to sleep with peace of mind. At those moments, I feel that I am truly "being present". I deal with what I can, and then leave the rest for later.<br />
<br />
As I've considered "being present" lately, I've come to realize that I am really only present while I'm working on a task, as I lay down to sleep, and in those first few precious moments when I first wake up in the mornings. I've also come to realize how many times I am NOT truly present. So many times as I'm chatting with someone, my mind is going in all different directions, sometimes even thinking of what I'm going to add to the conversation, or thinking of a story I'm going to tell. I'm NOT truly present when I go out to eat with someone. My phone sits on the table beside me. Any time it lights up, either with a call, text message, IM or email, I look at it/answer it/deal with it, no matter who I'm with. Even though it only takes my attention for a second, I'm not truly present with my family member/friend/co-worker or whomever I'm eating with. I'm NOT truly present when someone comes into my office because my mind is often on twenty different things at once. How hard would it be for me to just really stop and listen to the person in my office? I mean, really stop and listen... put them first. Be PRESENT. Why can't I leave my phone in my purse while eating a meal with someone? In an emergency, someone will call me. I can miss a text or two. After a friend's passing this year, I have really regretted not being more present when I was with her.<br />
<br />
Even at this very moment I am struggling for presence. I am writing/typing this blog post, listening/watching the tv, scanning the tabs at the top of my browser, noticing that I have 5 Facebook notifications, 4 Pinterest notifications and 3 unread emails, all the while wondering where Sophie is, how my friend's new cat is getting along with her dogs, what time I need to get up tomorrow, how Wade's trip is going and what Sheridan is doing. I mean, I'm present, but not really <i>present</i>.<br />
<br />
My 2017 resolution is this: to try harder to be present. For my family. For my friends. For my co-workers. I think it will make me a better person all the way around. I think I will be a better listener, a better communicator, a better friend. I think I will remember things better, because I've paid more attention when they were happening. I think I will be more productive. I honestly think that I will savor the moments and that 2017 will not rush by near as fast as 2016 did. As I get older, I have more of a desire for time to slow down. Maybe time is not the problem... maybe it's me. Maybe it's this busy world we live in...<br />
<br />
I'm up for the challenge. And I challenge each one of you to "be present" in 2017.<br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Verdana, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;">Matthew 6:34 says: Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Verdana, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;">Let's do this... 2017, Here I come!</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Verdana, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><br /></span>Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-65535342958614657982016-03-24T21:11:00.003-07:002021-07-17T18:58:50.502-07:00An Open Letter To My Ex<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>An open letter to my ex...</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">After seven years, you'd think I'd have it all figured out, right? Wrong. I'm still learning... a work in progress. This morning I woke with a strange sense of... realization? understanding? clarity? I can't exactly put my finger on the word I'm looking for. Clarity might be it. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I was lying in bed, thinking of all the good things in my life and I realized... I owe those good things to you. So, from the depths of my heart, "Thank You."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The two very best things I received from our marriage were our kids. God knew exactly what I needed in this life, and they are it. Without them, I could not have gone on when you walked away. So, first and foremost, thank you for them. They are my heart and soul, and I wouldn't be me without them.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Also, thank you for the many enjoyments and times we had in our marriage. Even though it ended so, so badly there certainly were good times and I have many fond memories.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Thank you for giving me Grandparents. My grandparents had all passed by the time we met, and yours took me in as their own. They loved me and cared for me so genuinely. And I felt the same exact way towards them. I will always be grateful that our marriage brought me the blessing of them.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And now for the... other stuff. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Thank you for leaving me. Thank you for making me stand on my own two feet. Thank you for causing me to be brave. Thank you for helping me to find myself again.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If it weren't for you I wouldn't have:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">1) My Job. After 17 years as a stay-at-home wife and mother, I found myself lacking. I lacked confidence. I lacked motivation. I simply lacked. Because you left me, I had no choice but to seek employment. Man, it was so scary after being out of the workforce for all those years. I started out at a very part-time job, just to get my feet wet. And then God directed me to sub at the school. He helped me to be good at that, and to find favor with the administration. And voila! Here I am today with a great job, and guess what? I'm good at it! I really am! What a pleasant discovery. So, thank you, for the confidence I have in myself now.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">2) My House. When you left, I was adamant that the kids and I were going to stay in OUR house, that you would not force us to leave. I won that argument, and stay we did. For a year. At the end of that first year, I asked the kids what they thought about moving in to town. They were both super excited and on board. With the help of The Lord, we were able to sell the house and build this one. Talk about empowering! I'm still amazed to this day that I waded through all the decisions, whether it be financially or physically, that got this house built. When I think about it, I almost faint in my mind it is so unbelievable. So, again, thank you, for the strength I found within myself.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">3) My family. You didn't have strong family ties. Your family wasn't typical when you were growing up, and you didn't feel the strong pull to be with your family like I did. Unfortunately, being your wife and believing that you had the final say, I missed out on a lot of times with my own family over the years. There weren't very many family trips to see relatives. We didn't spend weekends at my parents' house just to visit them. We went when there was a "happening", but we missed a lot of just simple enjoyment with them, and with the rest of my family. After you left, obviously, I clung to them. And they were there for me... more than you ever were. They loved me with a pure, unfailing love. Since then, I have enjoyed so many times with them. So, thank you. Thank you for giving me back my family. Thank you, sincerely, for granting me the gift of time with my Dad before he passed away. I will forever be grateful for that.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">4) My friends. It's a funny thing when you are married. Married people want to hang out with other married people. Well, at least that's usually the way it works. We hung out with EVERYONE. People of all ages, whether married or single. And yes, it was good. Really good. But, you know what? I didn't feel like I had very many friends. There is a difference in being friendly with people and having real, true friends. You know, those people that will have your back, no matter what? The ones that will be there for you, in the good times, but also in the times when you are a big bawling, slobbery, crying mess? Yeah, those kind. Thank you so much. When you left, I discovered who my real, true friends were. Although I was so sorely disappointed to discover how many I did not have, I was also so incredibly happy to discover who the real ones were. They know who they are, and I cherish them to this day.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">5) My cat. Yes, I know, we always had cats. You were very willing to allow me to have all the cats I wanted. But never, in any reality, would you have let me have an indoor cat. So once again, thank you. Thank you for leaving me. I love my Sophie-girl so much. I feel real, honest joy when I look at her.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">6) My free will. As a child, I grew up totally knowing that the day would come that I would marry, and when I did, that my "job" and "role" was to be in subjection to my husband. I knew that he would make the rules and the decisions in our home. So, I willingly gave up my free will and my freedom of choice. I lived without it for over 17 years, sometimes not so willingly. So, thank you, for giving that back to me. You can't imagine how freeing it is to decide whether I want to cook or go out to eat on any given day. You can't imagine how it feels to think, "I want to watch tv" and turn on the cable that you would never have allowed us to have. Or even to type this letter... I couldn't do that without the internet, which is also something you wouldn't let us have. If I want to go bowling, or to the movies with friends, I can. If I want new clothes, I can go buy them without having to ask anyone. I can wear all my junky jewelry. I can dye my hair. I can go get a pedicure if I want to. I can make friends at work, I can travel, I can do anything I want to do. There is no way that you can understand that because no one has ever taken away your freedom of choice, your free will. So, thank you. I love having it back.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You know, many times over the past seven years, I have not wished you well. I have been unable to feel kindness towards you. Thankfully, I kept most of that to myself. I tried my very best not to say cruel things about you in front of our kids. You might not have deserved that kindness, but our kids did. But this morning, as I lay in bed considering all these things, I can honestly say that I wish you well. I hope you find happiness in this life. I really do. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Once again, thank you for leaving me. If you hadn't, I would never have been able to become the woman I am today. I'm strong. I'm smart. I'm confident. I'm capable. I'm genuine. I'm sincere. And you know what else? I'm okay... and it's a good life. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6534758442380521068.post-85257635027156971112015-06-21T20:08:00.001-07:002021-07-17T18:58:25.853-07:00It Takes A Village<span style="font-size: large;">You may have heard the expression "It take a village to raise a child". In fact, I used that phrase just this morning in regards to my own children. As I went through the day, that saying just kept going over and over in my mind. I\"ve come to realize that it can pertain to many aspects of our lives, not just in raising our kids.</span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">We\"ve also heard, time and again, that we should help others... that we should show care towards our fellow man (or woman). Now, let me stop here and say that right now, <i>I don\"t have anything specifically that I need help with</i>. But I have in the past... oh man, yes I have. Case in point:</span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">Two summers ago, I just could not get my lawn mower to work. I\"m sure many of my friends heard my sob story, over and over that summer. I like to think of myself as fairly self-sufficient, but geeze... that sucker about put me over the edge. Try as I might, it just wouldn\"t work. And that meant that I had <b>the. worst. yard. in. my. neighborhood</b>. Hands down. It was extremely embarrassing. </span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;">And it was frustrating. <i>Oh, so frustrating</i>. As someone that is both the man and the woman of the house, and with limited funds, I was so overwhelmed. I felt utterly helpless. Today, as I rode my really nice John Deere mower (thank you mom!), I thought about how nice it would have been to have came home two summers ago, and to have found that someone had been by and mowed my yard, completely out of the clear blue, as a surprise, because they simply felt like it. I\"m here to tell you, I probably would have burst out bawling like a baby in appreciation. That being said...</span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">I wonder how many people out there are like me. How many need their yard mowed because they have no mower? How many have branches piled up in their yard because they trimmed their trees and have no way to haul off the cuttings? How many people have a broken window that they need help replacing? How many have a car that needs the oil changed and they can\"t afford to take it somewhere? How many people have an electrical socket that doesn\"t work and they don\"t know how to fix it? How many need stuff put up into their attic but they can\"t lift it? How many need a piece of furniture moved?</span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">How many?</span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">It\"s not just the single people. There are many that work two jobs and just don\"t have time. There are some that are too sick to do the household chores. Some people are too feeble. And surely, there are some that just don\"t know how to do something.</span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">Myself, I\"m not handy. I couldn\"t change their oil, or haul off their branches. But I could organize their closets. I could clean out a shed or garage for them. I could help them balance their checkbooks or set up a budget. I could help them have a garage sale. I could do their grocery shopping.</span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">What could you do for someone? Just imagine, if each one of us did one thing ever so often for someone else, how many things could we actually accomplish for others? And then, what if they paid it forward to someone else? How much joy could we bring to someone that feels overwhelmed, or is sick or simply frustrated because they can\"t fix their weed eater.</span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">You know... they aren\"t going to ask you. Or me. Even if we make a blanket offer right now, "Let me know if you need something, blah blah blah". I\"m telling you, from experience, <i>they aren\"t going to ask</i>. <b>They aren\"t going to call you</b>. You (and I) are going to have to ask them, over and over again. You may have to ask something specific. <i>"Can I come over and fix that broken window for you?"</i></span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">It takes a village to raise a child, but I tend to think it takes a village to simply make it through this life...</span><br><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;">Friends... let\"s make a change. </span><br><br><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXiOcIJPzBivYqU0bmAzPnXZpNo3syuQFNrbWQtYwJRbUiZYqqbDr4pK64LYlkYq6YHuyLaE65pYLemzPZy77myy8-NTq2KjL1OSoXt-9CxDHw1EgR-LmOL9JeDaMPagla1huFsID6buc/s1600/change.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXiOcIJPzBivYqU0bmAzPnXZpNo3syuQFNrbWQtYwJRbUiZYqqbDr4pK64LYlkYq6YHuyLaE65pYLemzPZy77myy8-NTq2KjL1OSoXt-9CxDHw1EgR-LmOL9JeDaMPagla1huFsID6buc/s640/change.jpg" width="419"></a></div><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span><br><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span>Sandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08750496167578424589noreply@blogger.com1